I'm on Tumblr.

http://dreamingaboutforever9.tumblr.com/

:)

..Endings?

I don't really understand what it is about endings that leave you so confused. Is it the excitement of what's going to come next, or the distress of leaving something imperfect, yet beautiful behind. Tomorrow's my last board exam. It's the last time I'll ever go to school in my uniform. The uniform I adore and the school I love immensely. I know its really not the time to think about endings, its almost 2 am and I have my Commerce paper tomorrow, technically today. But I can't help but think about how HPS is/was/will be everything that signifies truth to me. I'm obsessed with that place.I knew this day was coming, but little did I know that this is how I would feel. So desolate.

Endings.. The paths that lead you to new beginnings.
I don't know where this path is going to take me, don't know what obstacles are going to come ahead..
All I know is, my journey in HPS was inexplicably perfect and I can't even break down how much I'm gonna miss everything about it.
Today a part of me feels very empty.
No more shopping for new uniforms, no more school food and no more going to that wonderful place that makes me so happy.
That feeling when you get when you walk into school, when you see that building, when you see your friends, your teachers.. All those people you love.

12 years of unforgettable memories.
Can that feeling ever be replaced?
I look at it all, and wonder.

Its funny how when all my doors shut down I come back to my blog to release all my bottled up emotions. Well, its that time of the year again. Well, technically, its in a month. Exactly a month but the pressure's A LOT this time. When I read all my old posts now, it seems kinda funny how I over reacted for my 10th boards. But these, these need some serious attention. I have my pre-finals tomorrow and I threw my phone in my closet and deactivated my facebook account (Crowd Cheering!)
It does feel good. Sorta. I don't know.

I'm addicted to tv. I love dancing alone. I feel like dying when someone walks into the room when I'm doing that. Oh yeah, and coffee. What would I do without you?
This is pretty much my life now.

To everyone out there, who is stuck in the same situation as me, there is no hope. Oh wait, there is this picture I came across on Tumblr. Hope this helps. The girls, at least. This is what's been keeping me going. And coffee! Oh my god, did I mention coffee?

This is what my story's about.

Its funny how I've been in this place all my life, this place I call home.
My life, those memories, mistakes and growing up. I never really realized how much this place means to me.
Today, when its finally my time to leave, I see myself in others. THAT used to be my life, now its just a partial view. I see everyone sing the school song and when they do, I can't help but to notice their smiles. It just makes me understand how much I'm gonna miss this place. These trees, class rooms, buildings and teachers. Every corner that remarks a story of us growing up, growing as a family.
These fields, these large fields, they tease me. I don't mind it really.
I like my school like this.
I like HPS like this.
Huge, safe and loved.

God bless this school and all who herein dwell.

Happy Realization?

I just realized that I last updated my blog over a year ago. I don't even know how I lost touch. Well, school does keep me busy and life over the past year has been more than exciting. Maybe these are the perks of being 16. You learn so much that you feel like a butterfly. Okay, I don't know why I said butterfly. I totally forgot why I even started blogging in the first place. It always made me feel better. Blurting out whatever I felt like, about everything. Now that I realized that, I also understand how wonderful it makes me feel.

Sports day in a couple of days and this is my last year in HPS. Everyday is important. So what should I do?

Read a million books, listen to music and have fun while school life lasts. That's my plan of action for the next couple of months.

Oh yeah, and study.

Love and believe.

Its funny how times change. How 'I love you' suddenly becomes 'I loved you'. How the favorite thing you used to do, is just not your favorite anymore. School can be really crazy sometimes, but there's always so much to learn. I learnt that if you believe in hatred, there isn't gonna be any progress. Everyone hates me. Well, if thats what you believe that happens to you. You can believe that your mother hates you and she will. You can believe that your best friend hates you and she will. So, at the end of the day what matters is what YOU believe. So try to live in love. I had this favorite person I used to tell all my things to. Everything. My best friend. But I can't describe how little things ruin what we have. I don't blame fate, but only if I could have that back. But I know, I believe that love still exists. I know that this amazing person can't forget me, I do.
"Aishwarya, all you have to do is believe in yourself cause I do"-I'll never forget that. 
Now back to my love-hate theory, I believe that love never dies. If you stopped doing something you love cause you think its stupid, its high time you do it again and believe that people love you for what you are. Only then will you love yourself. 
Though I've lost some amazing people as my because of the mistakes I made or cause of fate, I'll never forget how they made me feel. Cause if it weren't for them, I'd never be what I am today, I'd never be what I'm gonna be tomorrow. 


I believe in love. I believe in ME.

SO true.

I found this on one of my friend's Facebook page.

:)